Breaking The Habit
by Yami Arike
Summary: Get your tissues. Kurama has a dream of the Makai, and he starts thinking about his life and what he really wants. Which might just happen to be Hiei. Deep thinking, yummy kissing, and a great ending.


Breaking the Habit  
A Yu Yu Hakusho fanfiction  
Disclaimer: Wrote at 2:00 a.m. So no flames. Linkin Park songs are perfect for anime fics.  
… = lyrics, kitsune=fox, Jaganshi-chan= little one whom possesses the Jagan, ai shiteru= I love you, ai shiteru mo= I love you too, Ningen=human, Makai= demon world.  
  
~~  
  
memories consume   
like opening the wound  
I'm picking me apart again  
  
Kurama sighed, waking up, a cold sweat drenching his young teenage body. Once again, a dream. No, more like a memory- a want form the Youko- a yearn for the Makai, the kitsune's real home. Kurama sighed, closing his eyes and trying to recapture what was left of his dream. It was useless, however, the details slipping through his mind like water through fingers.  
  
You all assume  
I'm safer in my room  
Unless I try to start again  
  
It was hard, living in the Ningen world. Knowing you're superior, knowing you're different. Sometimes it was a blessing. Other times, a curse. Usually Kurama didn't care, busying himself with helping others rather than tending to his own needs. He had always been like that. The person who gave you the reassuring smile and said just the right things.  
  
I don't want to be the one  
the battles always choose  
'cause inside I realize that I'm the one confused  
  
But the Youko was different. The Youko was ruthless, cunning, sly and devious. Perhaps that's why Kurama still feared the kitsune slightly- there was something regal that made you quake when you looked into those angular lupine eyes. Something primal and yet elegant. It was so hard to think about… Kurama held his face in his hands.  
  
I don't know what's worth fighting for  
or why I have to scream  
I don't know why I instigate  
  
He sobbed for all things lost. For his real home, the Makai, for all the years spent fussing and worrying over the conditions of those around him. He needed comfort too. He seeked a solace in someone's arms, someone whom would love and care for and cherish him. Kurama laughed darkly between his tears. Everyone knew the answer to that.  
  
and say what I don't mean  
I don't know how I got this way  
I know it's not alright  
  
Hiei. The other demon had always been there for him, and Kurama was slowly nursing their relationship deeper and deeper by day. But then he made the mistake. He said the words too soon…  
"Ai shiteru, Hiei."  
The dark-haired demon had fled. He had been gone for about a week now, and every night Kurama dreamt of his Jaganshi-chan. Every night, ruby eyes, black spiky hair, firm lips, and strong arms haunted him.  
  
so I'm breaking the habit… I'm breaking the habit.. tonight.  
  
"Kurama?"  
The redhead looked up. Hiei stepped inside the window, deftly, and Kurama instantly knew Hiei had come with a purpose. The gleam on the spiky-haired demon's eyes said that. Hiei approached the bed, sitting on it, his smaller hand resting on top of the kitsune's.  
"Ai shiteru mo, Kurama."  
Tears of pain and sorrow turned to joy and rapture. Kurama attempted to choke back a contented sob as Hiei sat in his lap.  
  
clutching my cure  
I tightly lock the door  
I try to catch my breath again  
  
Slender arms wrapped around Hiei, bringing him close.  
"What made you run away?" Kurama asked, tracing his soft lips against his Jaganshi-chan's jaw line.   
"Hn. I was afraid. I once told myself I would never fall in love."  
  
I've heard much more  
than anytime before  
I have no options left again  
  
"Oh, Hiei…" Kurama partially chided, closing his emerald eyes contentedly as Hiei kissed away all the tears coursing down the kitsune's face.  
"Are you crying so much over me, Kurama?"  
The redhead smiled, inhaling sharply when Hiei's lips grazed his ever so lightly.  
  
I don't want to be the one  
the battles always choose  
'Cause inside I realize that I'm the one confused  
  
"You. You and the Makai. But if I have you.. I don't care where I am."  
Hiei smiled, questing hands seeking a home in Kurama's silky hair as his mouth descended upon the kitsune's. Kurama kissed back fervently, moaning Hiei's name, pulling the demon closer to him and shivering at the exhilarating thrill he received from simply being near.  
  
I don't know what's worth fighting for  
or why I have to scream  
I don't know why I instigate  
  
"I'm sure the Makai misses it's favorite Youko too, Kurama." Hiei said gently, biting softly on the redhead's lower lip. Kurama laughed happily, opening his eyes and gazing over Hiei protectively.  
"This situation is compromising, ne?"  
  
And say what I don't mean  
I don't know how I got this way  
I'll never be alright  
  
"Indeed it is." Hiei replied, trailing his finger's down Kurama's pale chest. He always loved the feeling of his kitsune's skin- so soft and warm, delicate and milky. It was one of the things Hiei had first noticed about his koi when they had first met. The other two…  
  
So I'm breaking the habit… I'm breaking the habit.. tonight.  
  
"I love your hair, Kurama, "Hiei whispered, "it's so silky and smells like roses."  
Kurama flushed, getting used to the sound of Hiei talking to him like this.. so romantically. The spiky-haired demon stroked Kurama's cheek as if he were priceless.  
  
I'll paint it on the walls  
'cause I'm the one that falls  
I'll never fight again  
  
"Do you know what I first noticed about you when we met?"  
Kurama shook his head. Hiei smiled, gazing tenderly at the redhead.  
"Your eyes. They're so empathetic and large, and when I first saw you I felt as if you were looking right into my soul."  
  
and this is how it ends…  
  
Kurama sat up partially, bringing Hiei with him, kissing and nibbling on the neck of the crimson-eyed demon.  
"Do you remember what you told me before we went into Maze Castle? When you first lived here?"  
Hiei nodded knowingly.  
  
I don't know what's worth fighting for  
or why I have to scream  
But now I have some clarity  
  
"That you were the first person to give me a home."  
  
to show you what I mean  
I don't know how I got this way  
I'll never be alright  
  
And so it was. They held each other, finally admitting to their feelings, being in love and enjoying it to the fullest. Kurama's need for the Makai was erased because of his feelings for Hiei. And Hiei's dark demon soul healed because of how much he loved his redheaded kitsune. Material things aren't needed when you're in love, really. Because you see, Kurama and Hiei both had a home all along…  
  
So I'm breaking the habit.. I'm breaking the habit.. I'm breaking the habit.. tonight.  
  
.. in each other's arms.  
  
~end~ 


End file.
